Tuesday, December 20, 2011

I find it so funny.

So after having a rather emotional day, with the holidays, no family and what not, I started thinking about the past. More specifically when I was going to Addison High School. I have not really stated my opinions about this place in a long time, and I most definitely have not said what is on my mind since I moved to Utah. Most people here have no clue what happened the 3 whole semesters that I went to school there. Now for most, that sounds like a very short period of time but for me, well.. it was 3 months of hell. Let me elaborate.


I moved to my Moms house in Alabama the summer after 8th grade. I had been living in Michigan with my Dad for the almost 4 years prior. When I moved to Alabama I had a very thick "yankee" accent. I moved with my Mom to Addison, Alabama. A tiny, one red light town where high school football was gospel and the town was full of high school jocks that never quite understood that they were no longer in High School, still wearing their high school football wardrobe, still attending every game, still screaming louder than the refs and cheerleaders put together.. along side them were god fearing, bleach blondes wearing giant crosses around their necks. I hate to say it this way but the majority of people in this town never really left high school- as in their attitudes and way of life never changed. This is your typical small town in Alabama- or typical small town really anywhere in the south. Now, not everyone is like this in Addison, but most people will tell you that anyone that was raised there, never really leaves. Its kinda like they are trapped. Their grand parents and parents were raised there, lived there, built a life there and thus their children will too. The cycle is vicious- at least to me.


So I was an outsider. I started talking to my cousin, who was one grade above me, and she introduced me to people in my grade. I made friends with them over the phone but on the first day of school I was ignored. I went to this place I didn't know and started attending a school where I technically had no friends.   I was instantly made fun of because of my thick "yankee" accent. The jokes started then. You see, in towns like Addison, if you were not raised there, you never quite fit in. So I made a couple of friends.. Becky, Bridgette, Ashley.. I even started talking to a guy, one grade above me named Josh. Everything was going good until then. I remember when the hurtful things started..


Josh and I were walking together from class and I had his class ring on my pointer finger- that is how you stated to the school that you were a "couple". Then the itneys walked in front of Josh and myself. The itneys (Brittney, Britney, Brittany, Whitney) were 4 girls who were best friends, the "popular" girls in my grade. As they walked up to me, one of them said, "Hey Brittany, isn't that your ring?" They took the ring from me and laughed and walked off. Josh was still walking with me. These girls felt as if they owned this guy.. so much that they could do whatever they wanted whenever they wanted when it came to him. He was one of the most popular guys in the school- naturally they would think he belonged to them. Right? A couple of days later, he got the ring back for me, and two weeks later he broke up with me to be back with one of the itneys. Which one, I have not the fondest to be quite honest.


New Years Eve that year I went with my friend Ashley to a party. We told our parents that we would be at our friend Beth's house, which we were- we just left early. It started snowing so we were unable to drive back to Beth's house without wrecking. County roads in the back woods of winston county and snow do not mix. So we had to stay the night there- the next morning my Mom already knew we were not at Beth's and I was grounded for a month. By the time I went back to school, rumors were flying about me. Bad rumors, that I was pregnant, that I had an abortion, that I was a slut, that I was a whore.. I had barely even kissed a guy, let alone do anything like that. I mean I was only 14 years old for crying out loud. The harassment started there. Every day at school people were cornering me, from in the hallway to the lunchroom, questioning me, as if they had any right. I was innocent, completely innocent. My friends quit hanging out with me, and I was utterly alone. My mom had to change our house number too, because people were calling at 3 in the morning to ask if I was pregnant. I cried so much- nearly daily. The final straw happened in Home Ec, Mrs. Vickerys class. Remember the people that I said never really leave high school? Well she was one of them. I was cornered in the foyer of the building by about 60% of the girls in that class, yelling at me, calling me names and threatening me. And Mrs. Vickery stood behind them, never saying word and just looked at me. The next day my Mom went to the principals office to see if there was anything he could do to stop it. He suggested she move me out of the school. Instead of fixing the problem he wanted to just get rid of me. 


Now I am not the only person that this happened to.. I heard of one girl who was really good at gymnastics being shoved behind lockers and hit with broom sticks. That girl ultimately became an "itney" in the end, but at least I was never physically abused. Girls are vicious, and even more so in such a small town, where they feel they have everything to lose. 


Fast forward a few years. I was a typical Alabama girl I guess, I never really claimed the state because of how much I hated it there- that kinda ended when I moved to Utah, because my family is there and it is home to me. However, I would NEVER raise my kids there. Ever. I joined the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, I found God and I developed a relationship with my savior and I have never been happier- and the people that hurt me in the past, well they hate Mormons. Which most protestant religions do anyway. 


I got out. I moved away, acquired a really good job, I am getting my bachelors degree in Paralegal, I have the most amazing friends I could ever ask for. I am standing on my own two feet. I live in a big town, with many options. But you know what? Those people, the ones who cornered me in school, the ones who made fun of me for no reason, the ones that claimed to be my friends and then stabbed me in the back, well.. they are still in Addison. They will never leave, just like generations past- they are permanently tied to that town. The popular guys that everyone wanted, they are meth addicts working at trailer plants, most of which with criminal records, the girls? Well some of them moved on and acquired degrees and have good jobs, but they are still in Addison, or Winston County. The majority of them I see with pictures of them living in trailer parks, or pictures of them trashed at the bar. Living the dream, eh? You see it takes a certain type of motivation for people to realize that they are going no where in life. So this is to all of you who made fun of me, who called me names, who treated me like I was nothing- you gave me the motivation to do something with my life- the motivation to get out of Addison and actually LIVE my life. And while you stay there, in that one red light town, rotting away with no real future, I am living, truly living. I have everything I have ever wanted- and you have the exact thing that you tried to drag me down to.. nothing. I wish you all the best but karma is kinda a bitch. Suck it up buttercup, this is the life you chose when you decided to put people beneath you. I hope you are all happy :)

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